The Fortieth Birthday

 

I am Kavya, and it is not a good day for me.

Every time someone passes by my desk, I tense, dreading that someone will come to know that it is my birthday and will wish me. While I have always loved birthdays, specially mine, I am dreading this birthday like none other.

Today is my fortieth birthday. I cannot bear to think about this.

How did life fly by so fast? One day you are a teenager, dreaming about a career that will help you earn as well as make a good difference to the society, and about finding your soulmate and living with him happily forever. Before you realize it, you are forty, working as a software programmer in a MNC, earning not much but just enough to get by, and are woefully single.

I shake myself out of my pity party and try to concentrate on my work. A hopeless attempt, for while I am dreading that someone will make a huge fuss over my birthday, there is also that disappointed feeling that I am not doing anything special today. My parents called me over video to wish me. I am not expecting any other calls. Childhood friendships got lost somewhere in the flood of daily forwards, chat groups and reactions to every post in the social media. No one in the office knows and no one will bother. It has only been a year since I joined this MNC and while my colleagues are cool, we are not exactly wishing-each-other-birthdays close.

My intercom buzzes and I am summoned to my GM’s cabin. Work beckons as usual!

An hour later, I find myself outside the Ritz Hotel facing the beach. Chirag has accompanied me.

Chirag is the marketing consultant for our MNC. He meets potential clients looking for software for their firms/business and makes deals with him. He is the most successful consultant of our firm. At just thirty-five years of age, he is one handsome dude. That, along with his uber-confident stance and assuring voice ensure that clients fall for him within few minutes of meeting him.

Today he has arranged for a meet with the owner of the Ritz to know the software requirements for the hotel management. I have been assigned this project and I am super excited about it. Atleast one good thing would hopefully happen on my birthday!

Not just one. The beach!

I love it. I have often dreamt of spending evenings there on my own. But time constraints have made it impossible for me to visit the beach in the evenings. By the time I leave office, it is almost night. On weekends I am too lazy to leave the comfort of my home.

But the Ritz is situated at a walking distance from the beach, which means I might be able to spend the evening at the beach and hopefully catch a spectacular sunset.

I and Chirag step inside the hotel.

“Wow!” I say as I take in the grandeur of the hotel. “I am seeing a five-star hotel for the first time!”

Chirag smiles at me and gestures me to sit on the lounge while he proceeds to the reception. He talks to the receptionist who looks absolutely smitten by him.

“Seems Mr. Kapoor won’t be here until evening.” Chirag says with a sigh as he sits beside me.

“Oh. Now what do we do?”

He taps his fingers on his legs and then says, “Come on, let’s have lunch.” He gestures to the in-house dining inside the hotel.

I look at him wide-eyed. “You mean, there?” I know it will be too pricy.

He grins at me. “Come on.”

I follow him dazedly. Lunch in a five-star hotel’s restaurant!? Not a bad way to celebrate my fortieth!

I look at the menu and realize that I can’t pronounce half of the names in there. Without sounding condescending, Chirag explains the items to me and places the order.

A waiter approaches our table carrying a plate with red roses. He places them beside me with a smile and a flourish.

“They do this for everyone, you know.” Chirag says. I nod happily. I couldn’t care if they do it for every person coming here. This is special for me! I take the roses and arrange them in my handbag.

Over lunch, I and Chirag share news of the office. It is very easy for me to talk to him. He was the first one with whom I worked after joining the company. I usually accompany him on his visits to finalize clients and I interact with them for their software requirements. I have always found him to be easy-going and jovial.

Lunch passes by breezily and I really have a great time.

Chirag once again asks the receptionist and this time when he returns he shakes his head.

“Seems Mr.Kapoor won’t be here today.”

“Oh, okay. I guess we should return to the office then.” I say.

He looks at me and gazes out of the glass doors of the hotel. Then he looks at his watch and shrugs. “It is already four. Why don’t we spend the rest of the evening at the beach and call it a day?”

“The beach??” I ask incredulously. This is too good of a coincidence. My birthday is becoming more and more special by the minute.

I grin and Chirag grins back. “Come on.” This time I tell him and we both excitedly walk out of the hotel.

The beach is everything I imagined and better. The sun’s rays have painted the water and the sky in hues of pink and lavender. A gentle breeze blows, bringing with it the smell of salt and sea and I close my eyes to savor it.

Sitting beside Chirag who had miraculously brought a blanket with him, I feel complete today. Gone is the dread of my fortieth. This is life. I smile blissfully.

“I could use something to smile about.” Chirag says gently. When I look at him, I find him gazing at me with an odd expression.

I inhale deeply. “Thank you, Chirag. You don’t know, but today is my fortieth birthday, and you made it really, really special.”

He clears his throat. “I know.” When I look at him in surprise, he takes out a wrapped gift from his bag and gives it to me. “Happy birthday.”

“You knew all this while?”

He looks sheepish. “Actually, I also knew that Mr.Kapoor would not be available today. I just wanted to do something special for you on your birthday. I wanted it to be a surprise.”

I only look at him in confusion.

“I… I have a huge crush on you, Kavya. Right since the first day you and I worked together. I find you fascinating.” He says, sounding nervous for the very first time that I have known him.

“You do?” I ask in disbelief.

He chuckles. “Why so surprised? It is impossible for anyone to not to fall for you.”

“It is??” I ask stupidly.

He laughs. “Have you ever looked at yourself? You are… “. He searches my face for the right word. “You are you, Kavya. Amazing beyond words.”

His words warm my heart. I open the gift and gasp as I hold a limited edition of The Hobbit, one of my favorite books. I remember having confided in him a long, long time ago that I am a fan of J.R.R. Tolkien.

“You remembered!” I whisper.

“Of course I did. And I always will.” Chirag says. “So, what do you think? You and I – yay or nay?”

“I am elder to you by five years, Chirag.”

“Not an issue for me. Does that bother you?”

I look at him, seeing him in a new light. I think about all the moments we both have spent together. There has been laughter, fun and most importantly, companionship.

“How about you go out with me on a few dates, get to know me better? You can take your own time to decide about us.” Chirag says gently, understanding my hesitation in taking this major step of getting into a relationship.

If this didn’t work for me, then nothing will.

I smile at him and nod shyly. He looks as if all his wishes have come true in one moment.

We sit together in silent companionship, our shoulders touching, the promise of good times ahead filling my heart with hope.

The sun sets spectacularly, drenching the world in hues of orange and red. For me, they seem like the hues of love.

Flights, Babies And Magical Moments!

 

I am Navya, and I am traveling with my baby in a flight for the very first time.

I am nervous, and the reaction of the people beside whom I have to sit on the flight has done nothing to assure me. While one guy tried really hard not to wince, the other guy looked at my baby, shook his head and gazed out of the window.

Too bad that I get to sit in the middle of these two. Too bad that they will have to ‘suffer’ my baby who, in the meanwhile, looks supremely unconcerned.

The guy sitting on the window seat tugs his bag closer to his chest and stares out. The guy to my left leans back on his seat and closes his eyes.

I sigh. It is going to be a long flight.

---@@@---

I am Arnav, and I am frustrated.

It was bad enough that I didn’t get the window seat. I now have to sit beside a baby, who by the likes of it, gives every indication of being a royal pain.

I do not get the allure of babies. They are fragile, require a lot of attention and caring and patience, all three of which are missing in my case.

For two years, I and my wife have avoided the topic of parenthood. But she has started giving subtle hints. Although I do not mind becoming a parent, I just feel like I would not do much justice to the role.

The baby – Ayan, I think, I heard his mother address him so once – settles on his mother’s arms and grabs the bottle of milk with gusto. He makes cute cooing sounds. I would have enjoyed them if the baby’s tiny foot wasn’t kicking my ribs.

Actually, it wasn’t kicking. More like, touching softly, now that I observe.

A crazy thought comes to my mind. I gently tickle the baby’s underfoot. He widens his eyes, stops drinking and lifts up his head to look at me. Then he grins and playfully moves his leg up and down, gesturing me to tickle him again.

It is the grin that does me in. Converts me. Makes me a believer, if I may say. The grin is a mix of playfulness, happiness and innocence all rolled into one tiny being that has the capacity to wrap a grown adult around its little finger.

As I gently massage the baby’s soft underfoot, I realize that babies are really all right and perhaps it is time for me to start a family.

---@@@---

I am Shantanu, and I just wanted to sit in solitude beside the window seat and look out into the clouds, hoping that their sight will take away the melancholy of leaving my family behind. I am moving abroad for higher studies, and there is no saying when I will get to meet my parents and my sister.

I seriously never thought that it would be this hard. Saying goodbye to them has been the most painful moment of my life.

I just wanted to sit in silence and brood for a while, until the melancholy drifted away.

I didn’t expect to be seated beside an infant who promised utter mayhem throughout the flight.

Then I feel ashamed of myself for thinking such awful thoughts and risk a glance at the baby who is looking at me wide-eyed and curious.

His mother is searching for something in her bag and is holding the baby awkwardly on one hand.

“Here, I will hold him so that you can search comfortably.” I hear myself say and my hands, as if they have a mind of their own, stretch towards the baby. The lady looks at me in surprise and then hands over the baby to me.

I make him stand on my thighs and gently rock him. He giggles and starts moving his body up and down, as if gesturing me to do it again. I smile and repeat the motion. The baby giggles yet again delightfully.

Then he brings his palms near my face and gently rubs them on either side.

I close my eyes at the feeling of immense affection that the baby is projecting towards me. My eyes threaten to well up but I take deep breaths to compose myself. I settle the baby against my chest where he snuggles and looks at his mother.

Far too soon for my liking, she takes the baby from my arms after thanking me. I watch her gently rock the baby to sleep. The rocking motion calms my own turmoil and as I gaze outside at the clouds, there is a feeling of peace and bliss.

Really babies are all right. And I will be too. I know.